Chapter 156: Your Secret

Since Wei Dongheng has already appeared and admitted his concern with Xie Xue, Lv Zhishu, who was suspicious of Xie Xue before, has now dispelled his doubts.

She looked at Wei Dongheng and Xie Xue for a while with a complex expression, wanted to say something, but realized that she had no position, and finally said: "Sorry", and immediately grabbed the crocodile bag and ran away.

Xie Xue, whose anger at Lv Zhishu had not yet subsided and who found Wei Dongheng's arrival strange, asked, "How did you know I was here?"

Wei Dongheng : "I saw you when you were on the road in her car, thought it was strange and followed you."

"She's inexplicable, I thought she'd come to me for something, I didn't realize it was something so outlandish."

Wei Dongheng ordered a cup of coffee, and told Xie Xue to sit down and calm down, "I told you, the He family is a bunch of weirdos, especially this Lv Zhishu, who is so difficult to deal with."

He said here, eyebrows raised, but also do not forget to self brag: "unlike me, my family can be enlightened, I heard that our family only early years have a cousin aunt is more strange it ...... but she has passed away. Now my family are all the same as my little cute, I was a child grave jumping they can forgive me, my family is absolutely not to you to say this kind of animal words."

Xie Xue took a while to get a little more comfortable.

"Listening to what she just said, she seems to be sure that He Yu is in love, I don't know which girl is so unlucky ......"

Speaking of this, she suddenly remembered the scene of the taxi pickup in front of the hotel, and a ripple of uneasiness spread in her heart.

Wei Dongheng saw what she was thinking and scratched his slate - his proud silver rogue's head had been ordered by his father to be shaved, shaved to the inches of the army, and it hadn't grown back yet, and he hadn't had time to dye it.

"If you're really unsure, why don't you just call your brother yourself and ask him to see if he's been to that restaurant today?"

Xie Xue thought about it and actually made a call.

After waiting for a few moments, Xie Qingcheng's quiet and smooth voice came over, "Hello."

"Brother, what are you, what are you doing ......"

"Prepare for class. Something wrong?"

"Oh ......" Xie Xue suddenly breathed a sigh of relief. She immediately covered her megaphone and Wei Dongheng and said in exaggerated gibberish, "He--preparing--class--

Wei Dongheng snapped his fingers, dangling his legs and began to sway triumphantly, with a look of I knew it.

"No, it's fine, it's fine I'll just make a casual inquiry."

Xie Qingcheng felt that she was puzzled, but his sister had done not a few messy things since she was a child, and this kind of sudden call over to greet her brother was common, so he didn't ask any more questions, casually chatted with Xie Xue for a few minutes, and then hung up the phone.

"Phew-" Xie Xue let out a huge sigh of relief.

Wei Dongheng looked at her playfully and teased her, "Aren't you worried now that your brother just came back to prepare for class?"

"Impossible, my brother to prepare for a long time to prepare the class, then he must not have gone to the center of the city today." Xie Xue relieved, then rolled his eyes and scolded Lv Zhishu, "He Yu his mother is really a problem ...... also do not know He Yu sneak in and which female classmates to talk about love, this is really found by his mother, I'm afraid to be embarrassed to death. I really hope it's not a student in my class. ............"

.

Xie Qingcheng was not disturbed by Xie Xue's sudden call, he managed to finish preparing for the class, rushed to make the PPT before the class started, and then went to the school's convenience store to buy some kanto boiled food after the two classes were over, and went back to the dormitory with the intention of taking a rest.

He walked to the door of the faculty dormitory, but suddenly got very dizzy, and he had to stand against the cold metal door for a while before he gradually eased up.

When Xie Qingcheng entered his home, the first thing he did was to boil water for himself and take medicine because of his sudden discomfort.

But when I opened the drawer, I found that the stored medication was empty.

Xie Qingcheng was stunned for a few seconds, he realized that he was really negligent, not only did he not take his medication on time yesterday and today, but he also forgot that he had run out of medication at home.

Adding a hand to his forehead, he leaned against the liquor cabinet and pressed and rubbed his temples, beginning to reflect that perhaps He Yu wasn't the only one who had gone up and sunk in these past few days.

And himself.

He had always been a meticulous man, but now he was hanging out with a young and foolish brat to the point where he had forgotten about his own illness.

Xie Qingcheng Thinking about this, that feeling of heartburn and irritation came back.

He closed his eyes.

The feeling of dizziness lingered, and finally Xie Qingcheng had to get up, put his coat back on, and took a taxi, heading for the Meiyu Private Hospital.

"Here are your detailed labs for this one, and here's the medicine."

Inside the dean's office, Qin Ciyan's old friend pushed a piece of paper and two boxes of medicine to Xie Qingcheng.

"You can read the lab results yourself. There's no need for me to say anything."

Xie Qingcheng took the slip and looked at it as calmly as he would any patient's slip.

He finished reading his list.

"It's a little worse than I thought it would be for myself." He said.

Dean: "If you had stopped taking RN-13 earlier, it wouldn't have come to this."

Xie Qingcheng lit a cigarette and took a drag without answering.

After a while, he said, "How long do you think I'll last?"

"There's actually hope for you if you're willing to go to the United States for treatment, with today's technology, but you-"

"But you know I won't."

The dean sighed heavily, "Five or six years if you don't go to the hospital for proper treatment. All of your five organs are already failing rapidly, and at the rate you're going, it'll be six years at most, I think you should know that in your own heart."

Xie Qingcheng : "...... What if I increase the number of times I come in for therapy shots?"

The dean looked at him, "Xie, that's going to hurt. You know the dose of medicine that works for you, and with the dose you're on now, the pain is already more than a thousand times that of chemotherapy. Even if your pain senses are duller than normal, using it once is like dying. And why should you have to."

"Because there are things that if I don't do them, no one else is going to finish them."

"...... I don't think if Old Qin was alive he could see you like this now."

"But I have no other choice."

The old dean let out another deep sigh, what he knew about Qin Ciyan and Xie Qingcheng was not complete, but not too little either.

In the past, he had respected Xie Qingcheng's ideas in some of his decisions, and had kept the secrets he should have kept for him, however, watching such a person, step by step in front of himself towards the end of his days, that kind of powerlessness still caused the old dean to sigh in dismay.

"If you're going to get the increased number of therapeutic shots, then you need to be prepared. Your body's stress response will be severe and easy to spot if you get these shots too often ......"

Xie Qingcheng : "I know."

"...... you go to the injection room."

Xie Qingcheng got up.

The old dean, who seemed tired of communicating with Xie Qingcheng, suddenly called out to him the moment he was about to walk out of the dean's office.

"Xie Qingcheng."

Xie Qingcheng's fingertips on the doorknob stopped, and he turned his head slightly sideways.

Old Dean: "I understand your choice very well, but you are suffering like this and there is no one around you who knows about it or who can come and be there for you. I don't think you treat them like this, is considered merciful, you have to realize that your family and friends not only hope that you can give them protection, they likewise hope that you can allow them to take care of you ...... or else when they know the truth of that day, they can't bear it."

Xie Qingcheng paused for a moment and said, "Then never let them know."

He pushed the door and disappeared at the end of the white hallway.

There is a special injection room in the Miyu Hospital that is reserved for Xie Qingcheng.

There is no one in the injection room, there will not be any medical care for company, everything is known only to the dean, and it is all done in secret.

Xie Qingcheng familiarly checked the biometric information and the door opened.

--

Here is the truth that Xie Qingcheng has been hiding from almost everyone close to him for the past few years.

Inside was a three-man-high standing incubation bin with a breathing mask, restraint straps, connecting syringes, and a call button that could call the dean's office for emergency help.

Aside from this incubation bin, the only thing in the injection room was a cold metal bed, a medicine cabinet, and an operating table.

Nothing more.

This is Xie Qingcheng's private treatment room.

Ever since he restarted taking RN-13 in secret, he has had to come to this place for treatment. Initially coming just two or three times a year, he slowly got worse and worse, and lately he's gotten to the point where he has to come in for treatment almost once every month or two. That's why when He Yu stuck to him before, he would find him disappearing progressively more often.

He's right here.

He had to repair his body, even if the process was far more painful than chemotherapy.

The whole space is quite mechanized and unheated, and the only thing that gives comfort to those in it is a cloud-like jellyfish engraved on the glass cover of the incubation chamber - the jellyfish is Xie Qingcheng's only companion during the extreme pain of the special treatment injections.

Xie Qingcheng knows the house so well that it's like going back to his own home. He did the extermination and injected the medicine into the barn's infusion tube himself ......

When all the preparations were complete, Xie Qingcheng took a deep breath and prepared to step into the petri dish as usual.

And just then, his cell phone suddenly rang.

The person who called was He Yu.

"Hello."

"Hey Shea, I'm out of class, where are you?"

The boy's voice on the cell phone was bright, booming, with some anticipation. Xie Qingcheng could even clearly hear the noisy voices of the students around him as he walked out of the classroom.

The young learners were discussing with their peers in a carefree manner, "What are we going to eat tonight?"

"There's a new barbecue place on East Street, and I've heard great things about it ......"

"Brother Xie?" He Yu pronounced his name, snapping him back to consciousness.

Xie Qingcheng was alone in this cold, metallic-colored treatment room, listening to the movement on the boys' side, and for a moment, he actually felt that he was in hell listening to the sounds of the earth.

He was quiet for a moment and said, "Something came up, a meeting outside."

"Another meeting?"

"Well, temporarily."

"How long will it take to drive?"

Xie Qingcheng : "What's wrong?"

"I'd like to have dinner with you tonight."

"......"

"I'll wait for you to come back, okay?"

"No need." Xie Qingcheng came back to his senses, "My meeting ended late, so you can eat by yourself. If you really don't want to be alone, just find someone to replace me."

He Yu: "But no one can take your place."

"...... really doesn't work."

"Alas ...... so busy ah ...... then well, then this time even." He Yu probably felt that he was pressed for time, so he said, "You go ahead with the meeting, I won't bother you, I'm hanging up."

After ending the call, Xie Qingcheng threw his cell phone on the treatment bed, and he saw his own reflection in the metal plate, blurring his features as if he had no expression.

-Yes.

He's not supposed to make waves.

Xie Qingcheng got up, one narrow finger inserted into the tie knot buckle, tugged the tie loose, thought for a moment, then turned the cell phone off, walked into the incubator bin, and pressed the start button, while slowly closing his eyes.

The breathing mask was lowered and fastened over his mouth and nose, covering most of his face. The injection tube was pierced through the red mole on the back of Xie Qingcheng's neck, and at the same time, the drug mist steamed up, slowly filling the entire incubator.

Hallucinogenic gas.

A long injection.

The peripheral reactions are more intense than the cancer pain.

The dean's description is not wrong. Every time Xie Qingcheng lies down in the incubator, it's like he's going through a death sentence. The air pressure in the incubator will start to increase dramatically after Xie Qingcheng has injected the body drug, the eardrums, sinuses, and heart will be forced to withstand extreme pressure, and the hallucinogenic ingredient in the drug will start to kick in at this time, and it will make Xie Qingcheng have the delusion that it is as if a bone has been pulled out of his body, and then irregularly jabbed back into his internal organs, and they will give birth to splinters and spines in his flesh and blood, and then be violently pulled out as if they are going to be pulled together with his body, and then he will have to be taken out. In his flesh and blood, they gave birth to splintered thorns, and then they were violently pulled out, as if they wanted to drag his soul along with him.

This process would last for a long time, so the incubator had to be set up with straps and handcuffs wrapped all over his body, and every time he struggled, the straps got tighter and the cuffs got tighter and tighter, and by the end of the day his skin and flesh were worn through, and it was like he was completely caught up in the net, and he couldn't move even half an inch any more.

And that's when the real pain begins.

The side effects of the overdose will cause the person in the warehouse to fall into more and more realistic hallucinations, and the amygdala of the brain will start to be disorganized under the continuous and strong influence, and Xie Qingcheng's eyes will keep replaying the most horrifying and painful memories of his life.

Death of parents.

Car accident.

Qin Ciyan died.

He left the hospital ......

Fear continues to spread through the nervous system.

He sees the rising water level of the studio and hears Jiang Lanpei's ghostly song.

When he saw Xie Xue collapsed in Cheng Kang Psychiatric Hospital, he thought for a moment that she was dead, that she had been separated from her body.

And then he seemed to be stuffed whole again into a tattered bear doll as he dragged his tattered body towards home.

Xie Xue as a young child, however, shouted at him, "You're not him! You're not a brother!"

It's like he has to die after he's died in his body all over again ......

No one knew how much pain he was in, no one knew how much courage it took for him to live.

He was in the barn, his pale face hidden in the drugged fog. His wrists were cuffed with shackles, his neck was bound with a halter, and his snow-white shirt was strung deep with black restraint straps, so that even his cries of pain were lost inside his breathing mask.

It hurts like hell.

It's like dissecting a limb in the raw and digging a heart out.

By the time the treatment was all over, it was more than three hours later.

Xie Qingcheng slowly awoke from the coma triggered by the severe pain, the little bit of forehead hair he had hanging down was completely wet with sweat.

He opened his eyes slowly, as he had done countless times in the past after this set of injections, he was so tortured that for a moment he didn't even know what night it was.

The barn door was automatic and finally opened slowly. The little bit of medicinal fog left inside dispersed, and in the haze of the mist, Xie Qingcheng's figure was revealed after finishing the treatment.

It was vulnerability and exhaustion rarely seen.

Xie Qingcheng was bound so stiffly and coldly inside the barn, he had taken off his jacket when he entered the barn, and was only wearing a plain white shirt and black suit pants, which were now completely wet from the drug mist and sweat, and clung to his body. The white shirt, when wet, vaguely revealed the blood color of the skin underneath and the lines of the muscles. His chest, upper arms, belly, waist and crotch ...... all the way were tightened by the restraint straps, as if he did not have some disease, but committed some crime.

Xie Qingcheng's face had no blood on it, and his eyes were empty.

The healing bin slowly took off and landed, an automated device that held the person flat on the healing metal bed in front of him and lowered him down.

Xie Qingcheng was unconscious when he lay on that narrow bed.

He just lay so limp, the person looks like he just got out of the water, what strength is gone ...... just so lonely, cold.

The sadness of the dream still suffused his brow and he looked broken.

It seems like wrecked porcelain.

As if life had come to an end a long time ago.

He lies in unseen ruins, or perhaps he himself is the ruins.

The only thing left to prove he was still alive was the faint rise and fall of his chest ......

Five or six more years.

That's the end of such a life.

Xie Qingcheng took a long reprieve on the healing bed before regaining control of her body and sitting up.

Even his fingers were shaking slightly as he buttoned his jacket.

He wiped away the physiological tears at the end of his eyes and slowly covered up all traces of pain, especially the scars on his wrists ...... as if they had been strangled by handcuffs ......

Out the door.

Leave.

Yes, that's the secret he's blocking out - what Xie Qingcheng said to He Yu in the reservoir is true, but not the whole story. He's still hiding part of the truth--

A portion of the truth pertaining to his current situation.

Xie Qingcheng was once judged not to live past the age of forty. Later, the United States developed a special soothing drug, and he chose to give up his ability to undergo medication, thus obtaining a body not much different from that of an ordinary person and being able to lead an ordinary life.

But what he didn't tell us all was that after Qin Ciyan's death, and after some time, a lot of things happened - Li Ruoqiu divorced him, and Xie Xue got into the university of his choice, and Chen Man also entered the public security system after hard work.

Those around him either went to hell in a handbasket, or to the sidelines, or to independence.

He is like a tree, when fall and winter come and all the leaves on the branches leave.

He realized that he was no longer an indispensable dependency in anyone's life.

And it was during that bout that two accidents occurred--

The first, Qin Ciyan's legacy, was destroyed.

At that time, those handwritten files were piled up in seven or eight cartons, and except for the ones that Xie Qingcheng was organizing, all the others were left at home.

These voluminous materials were treasures to Xie Qingcheng, writings that he had to finish organizing for Old Qin, but they were of no value to anyone else, so Xie Qingcheng did not think that they would be targeted at all.

However, he returns home one day to find that the house has been burglarized, Old Qin's notebook has been thrown everywhere, and the burglars seem to be trying to find something in Old Qin's data, but they end up with nothing.

In his anger and frustration, the burglar maliciously burned several of those medical notes of Qin Ciyan with a fire engine, and threw another twenty or so into the bathroom, wetting them all with a shower.

By the time Xie Qingcheng found it, almost none of the words on it were legible ......

Xie Qingcheng At that moment, I felt that the sky had collapsed. Reported to the police, resuscitated ...... but in the end, it was not settled.

Criminal judgment is concerned about a criminal consequences, Xie family what valuable things are not lost, damage is only some so that the police do not judge the value of the medical notes only, although the case can be filed, who will seriously trace?

What's more, even if someone is found, the 20 to 30 notebooks that have crystallized Qin Ciyan's life will not come back.

Xie Qingcheng does not remember how he survived that period of time; he dreamed of Qin Ciyan every night of those days and nights, of the old man's back as he sat at his desk writing. He dreamed of Mrs. Qin solemnly handing him the information, sending him outside the red brick building, bowing slightly with tears in her eyes, and seeing him off.

He woke up every night with such heart-rending guilt that his hand trembled so badly when he touched his cigarette to light it.

He didn't know how to make up for all this loss and give an explanation to the old Qin couple.

He could only keep speculating on what was actually written and recorded in the Qin Ciyan remnants in other notes of the corresponding period ...... But much of the experimental data that was missing was just that, missing and never to be recovered.

Who was the burglar who broke into the house?

What exactly do they want to find in Qin Lao's profile?

Xie Qingcheng is in pain and has not been able to get an answer.

Until the second accident.

--

Qin Ciyan's daughter, who is married in the United States, is kidnapped by a mysterious organization, and when the police rescue her, Qin Rongbei, Qin Ciyan's daughter, has already been tortured to the point of complete insanity, and has been sent to the local psychiatric hospital for mandatory isolation treatment.

And in that hospital, Qin Rongbei often repeats one phrase--

"Don't ask me, I don't know what a First Emperor is."