Chapter 53: Check

Tan Mo has heard so many insults and slights since he was a child that he used to be uncontrollably angry and impulsive, until he grew up and no longer cared about what people said or denigrated, and seldom got angry because of what others said.

But he would never have imagined, one day, he could not say a word of heavy words do not want her to have a little sad, but because of his own reasons, was labeled with such ugly words.

Moo residue.

As long as these two words are said, Tan Mo feels that even breathing is hard to not be able to, because it is good for him, just because she is too good and too kind, so inexplicably bear these dirty words.

All because of him.

Tan Mo finally realizes what all the weird looks from people over the past two days are due to.

Qiao Lan could not have not known, but Qiao Lan she did not tell him, as for the reason, it is not difficult to guess, but Tan Mo can not feel touched, anger and remorse has burned him to the core.

After gym class, Tan Mo looked at the girl's smile, which was still without any darkness, and Tan Mo opened his mouth, but he didn't say anything.

What, that Qiao Lan should stop being nice to him in the future, so that people wouldn't get the wrong idea that she likes a physically challenged person?

Qiao Lan's refusal to tell him about it was a clear indication of her attitude, that she would never change her stance because of the gossip of others.

And it's not even about Qiao Lan, it's about him.

Tan Mo sat on the sound of the car, not saying a word, and it didn't take him long to figure out the way to cut off the possibility of these remarks, clear and unambiguous, in only two ways.

First, he took the initiative to stay away from Qiao Lan, and even left the place altogether; as soon as he left, all the strife would dissipate with him.

Second, if he can stand up.

He knew that not only could he not stand on his own two legs, but compared to his legs, his psychological disability made him feel even more uneasy and inferior when facing Qiao Lan. He once thought that even if he could stand up one day, Asperger's would still be with him for the rest of his life.

Asperger's is a birth disability with no possibility of cure.

But now that Qiao Lan has been vilified for his crippled legs, Tan Mo sees what it means to get back on his feet.

If it meant keeping Qiao Lan out of harm's way, he'd give up what he'd once stood for, even if it meant making up for his mother's guilt.

He's actually such an incredibly selfish person.

There are two paths he can take, he can choose to leave Qiao Lan far away, but as soon as he closes his eyes, as soon as he thinks about his future life without Qiao Lan's traces, Tan Mo does not dare to think about it anymore.

It's like being out of water.

It's going to die.

He wanted to pick the second path.

The scene of the car accident began to float uninterruptedly in his mind, his mother's screams when the out-of-control car crashed into him, his mother's still bright eyes when she shielded him in her arms at the last moment, the complete coma under the severe pain in his legs after the explosion, as well as his grandparents pointing at him and saying that he had delayed his mother's life and killed her life.

The car accident, the explosion, the blood, the hospital, one scene after another flashed in front of his eyes, Tan Mo's eyes opened wide in pain, but nothing could be seen in front of him, the traumatic stress reaction that hadn't struck for a long time slammed into his brain, and he was questioned over and over again, asking him why he reversed course, why he wasn't the one who had died in the first place, and why he was not the one who died, and why he was not the one who died in the first place... You've betrayed your beliefs... You're going to be punished... The people you protected will also be punished... The people you protect will also suffer retribution...

Breathing more and more rapidly, Tan Mo had to put his hand tightly over his heart, Uncle Chen was startled by Tan Mo's sudden change and was so frightened that he slammed on the brake to stop the car.

Uncle Chen opened the car door and asked him what was wrong, and in his haste, he grabbed Tan Mo's wrist with a strong grip, a dull pain on his wrist, Tan Mo looked down in a trance and saw the peace knot and the obsidian bead on his wrist.

"If you turn your back on your beliefs there must be bad luck..."

Tan Mo looked at the black bead and muttered, "Just let it all come down to me."

Everything has nothing to do with Qiao Lan, and if there is a retribution, it should be borne by him alone.

Uncle Chen was shocked by his sudden relapse, and when he heard Tan Mo's muttered words, his eyes turned red and he asked him what was wrong.

It was only after a long time that Tan Mo's eyes finally came into focus, he lowered his head and looked at Uncle Chen and slowly spoke, "Contact the doctor for me."

Uncle Chen As if he heard some unbelievable words, for a moment the man was stunned in place, and only after a long time did his hands tremble with excitement.

"Contact... I'll contact tomorrow... No, no, no... contact as soon as I get home..."

Uncle Chen did not know what had happened to make Tan Mo finally come to his senses and give up his paranoia, Tan Mo did not say, it did not matter! He also did not ask, Tan Mo finally accept treatment, already enough to make him excited to say.

When he got home that day, Uncle Chen immediately called the doctor who was responsible for Tan Mo's surgery when Tan Mo had just returned from abroad. Although it was possible for the doctor to come to Tan Mo's home for a checkup, there was no equipment at home, so it was best to go to the hospital.

Tan Mo sat in his wheelchair, his fingers gently sliding across the screen of his cell phone, quietly looking at the WeChat box where he chatted with Qiao Lan.

The last WeChat was not long ago, a daily good afternoon from Qiao Lan after talking to her at noon.

Looking at this good afternoon, Tan Mo sat motionless for a long time, until the time passed 9:30, after the evening study at school, Tan Mo only sent a WeChat to Qiao Lan, telling her that she would not go to school tomorrow.

Less than half a minute after the message was sent, Qiao Lan's phone called, the girl's voice somewhat inaudible amidst the noise and clamor.

"What's wrong," Qiao Lan asked him, just as he suddenly tensed up, "is it another leg pain?"

"Well," Tan Mo said, "that's why I'm not going tomorrow."

"If you don't feel well, just rest at home, your body is the most important, you are too weak now", the girl was sometimes like a little Tang Monk, sometimes more nagging than Auntie Chen, but Tan Mo listened for a long time, she was talking on the other end of the phone, he was over here quietly listening.

On the other end of the line, Bai Yu was probably calling out to her, asking who she was talking to, and Qiao Lan, half-heartedly, said, "Tan Mo."

Tan Mo's heart suddenly ached, and she hurriedly found an excuse to hang up the phone.

Uncle Chen waited for him to come in after the call and said, "The doctor has been contacted and we'll be there in the morning."

"Uh-huh," Tan Mo nodded as his body moved.

Uncle Chen took a deep breath and hesitantly asked him, "Going to the hospital tomorrow... Is it really okay."

Tan Mo's fear and rejection of hospitals and doctors is so severe that Uncle Chen still feels terrible whenever he remembers the knife that Tan Mo stabbed into his leg.

"Yes," Tan Mo said in a surprisingly calm tone, "Call me in the morning on time."

Uncle Chen nodded and closed the door for Tan Mo.

Waiting for the door to close Uncle Chen's face collapsed in a flash, he sat on the sofa, the old man in his fifties nearly sixty years old covered his eyes, silent but unable to hold back the tears.

He didn't tell Tan Mo that he had just spoken to the doctor, who said that Tan Mo's leg had been dragging for too long and that it might, well, be difficult.

The doctor said it would be difficult, but Uncle Chen realized that Tan Mo's real situation might be much more difficult than that.

He sat alone in the living room for a long time, wiped his face and went back to his bedroom, and the next day, still in high spirits, woke Tan Mo up as if he didn't know anything about it, and took Tan Mo to the hospital.

It took Uncle Chen a great deal of effort to push back the doctor's morning appointment, leaving the earliest possible time for Tan Mo.

It hadn't been too long since the last time he'd been to the hospital, Tan Mo had been there the last time his grandfather had died, but today it wasn't for anyone else but himself, and the one being examined wasn't anyone else but him.

At the thought of this, Tan Mo's nerves had begun to tense up uncontrollably.

The examination process, as if slowed down, was even more difficult than Tan Mo had imagined, as he listened stiffly to Uncle Chen's answers to the doctor's questions, laying on the cold equipment and listening to the various machines ticking in his ears.

It's been a year and a half since the crash, and he hasn't had any professional tests in a year and a half, and now one by one, including his legs, including his overall fitness.

The whole morning passed, and the doctor's countenance became more and more serious from its initial solemnity.

Although Qiao Lan had taught him a lot of expressions, Tan Mo was still unable to detect such small emotional changes as solemnity and seriousness, only Uncle Chen felt the temperature of his heart getting lower and lower little by little.

The doctor signaled Uncle Chen to follow him out, Uncle Chen pretended to be relaxed and asked Tan Mo to wait, then followed the doctor out.

The doctor took a thick stack of films and other things from the examination and pointed them out to Uncle Chen one by one.

The specialization was very strong, Uncle Chen couldn't understand all of it, but he could understand the general idea, he clasped his hands together, "No need to talk to me about this, I don't understand, I just want to know... I just want to know... whether it can still be cured..."

At the end, Uncle Chen almost said it through clenched teeth.

The doctor was silent for a long time and sighed, "The treatment was originally incomplete because of the patient's resistance, and then after a year and a half without professional examination and treatment, the transverse muscle dystrophy led to muscle atrophy, and the transverse muscles had spread over several places in the body, and later on the nutritional deficiencies appeared again. Rehabilitation is supposed to be very painful and very difficult, and the young master's long-term physical deficit can't hold up to rehab at all, so..."

"So there's a high probability that the young master will... He'll be confined to a wheelchair for the rest of his life."

Uncle Chen's eyes were red in color, but he still asked, "What's the probability... How big..."

"Ninety-eight percent."

Uncle Chen only felt his brain explode, the whole person could no longer stand at that moment, staggering backward a few steps, the doctor hurriedly grabbed Uncle Chen, but froze in place after looking up.

Tan Mo came out at some point without a sound, his light brown eyes still looking unmoving.

He looked quietly at the doctor and Uncle Chen, and after a long time repeated softly, "Ninety-eight percent."

The doctor hastily changed his tone, "It's actually not that high..."

It's actually supposed to be higher, right, ninety-nine percent, or even... Hundred percent.

He had thought that he had chosen a different path and perhaps a new beginning, but he hadn't realized that his comeuppance would come so quickly.

He had said that if there was any bad luck, please punish him as much as you can.

Now it was all fulfilled, but it had come much sooner than he had imagined.